the tiny pianist... muz see !!
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The Tiny Pianist
A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and places the bag on the counter. The bartender walks up and asks what's in the bag.
The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about one foot high and sets him on the counter. He reaches back into the bag and pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter as well. He reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in front of the piano. The little man sits down at the piano and starts playing a beautiful piece by Mozart!
"Where on earth did you get that?" says the bartender.
The man responds by reaching into the paper bag. This time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the bartender a! nd says: "Here Rub it."
So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke and a beautiful genie is standing before him. "I will grant you one wish. Just one wish -- each person is only allowed one!"
The bartender gets real excited. Without hesitating he says, "I want a million bucks!" A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is soon followed by another duck, then another. Pretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks and they keep coming!
The bartender turns to the man and says, "Y'know, I think your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks."
"Tell me about it!!" says the man, "do you really think I asked for a 12inch pianist?"
**i'm sure Frust8ed will understand find dis joke very familiar ya??!! hahar !! -
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another joke....
A young woman goes to church to confess her sins to the priest.
"Forgive me Father, for I have sinned."
"Tell me all of your sins, my daughter."
"Oh, Father, last night my boyfriend made hot, passionate love to me seven
times," she says.
The priest thinks about this long and hard, and says, "Take seven lemons and
squeeze the juice into a tall glass, and drink it."
"Will this cleanse my soul of my sins?"
"No," the priest says, "but it'll wipe that smile off your face!" -
A man and his wife are lying in bed when the husband starts caressing her
back.
"Not tonight, dear," she says. "I have an appointment with the gynecologist
tomorrow." So the husband rolls over and tries to go to sleep. A few minutes
later, he turns back and again starts caressing her back.
"Honey, stop," she says. "I told you I have to go to the gynecologist in the
morning."
"I know," he answers. "But you don't have to go to the dentist, do you?" -
Two old men go to an escort service house. The madam asks, "What do you
want?"
They say, "Women."
She asks, "How old are you?"
They say, "90."
So she tells one of the girls to take them upstairs and put each of them in
a room with a blow-up doll. So they go upstairs and do their thing.
When they come back downstairs, the first old man asks the other, "How was
it?" The other one says, "I think she was dead, she just lay there. How was
yours?"
"I think mine was a witch."
"A witch?"
"Yeah, I bit her on the tit, so she farted and flew out the window." -
i tink my dear dear larling is running a bad fever.. brain damage le..
Say all thing kinda lame stuff.. -
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hahar !! all the weird weird emails i received mah.... so i post loh....Originally posted by Gackt247:i tink my dear dear larling is running a bad fever.. brain damage le..
Say all thing kinda lame stuff.. -
Oic larling..Originally posted by carpe diem jur:hahar !! all the weird weird emails i received mah.... so i post loh....
Sth i learn from the army..
One of the symptoms of heat injury is talking rubbish..
So go show some concern to the fren who sent u those mails..
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Originally posted by Gackt247:Oic larling..
Sth i learn from the army..
One of the symptoms of heat injury is talking rubbish..
So go show some concern to the fren who sent u those mails..
so, is it tym u show some concern for mi too??? -
A man was brought to Mercy Hospital and taken in for coronary surgery. The
operation went well and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was
reassured by a Sister of Mercy, who was waiting by his bed.
"Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," said the nun, gently patting his
hand. "We do need to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay
here. Are you covered by insurance?"
"No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.
"Can you pay in cash?" persisted the nun.
"I'm afraid I cannot, Sister."
"Well, do you have any close relatives?" the nun asked.
"Just my sister in New Mexico," he volunteered. "But she's a humble spinster
nun."
"Oh, I must correct you, Mr. Smith. Nuns are not 'spinsters.' They are
married to God."
"Wonderful," said Mr. Smith. "In that case, please send the bill to my
brother-in-law." -
Originally posted by carpe diem jur:A man was brought to Mercy Hospital and taken in for coronary surgery. The
operation went well and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was
reassured by a Sister of Mercy, who was waiting by his bed.
"Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," said the nun, gently patting his
hand. "We do need to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay
here. Are you covered by insurance?"
"No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.
"Can you pay in cash?" persisted the nun.
"I'm afraid I cannot, Sister."
"Well, do you have any close relatives?" the nun asked.
"Just my sister in New Mexico," he volunteered. "But she's a humble spinster
nun."
"Oh, I must correct you, Mr. Smith. Nuns are not 'spinsters.' They are
married to God."
"Wonderful," said Mr. Smith. "In that case, please send the bill to my
brother-in-law." -
Larling.. sure.. how do u want me to express love, care n concern? Awww.. poor deprived baby..Originally posted by carpe diem jur:
so, is it tym u show some concern for mi too??? -
so how u gotta express ur love, care, concern?? ooh yeah, and also the monthly allowance, food allowance, wardrobe allowance, entertainment allowance, blah blah blah.... ooh ya, and also SPA allowance, spa til my skin drop... hahar !!Originally posted by Gackt247:Larling.. sure.. how do u want me to express love, care n concern? Awww.. poor deprived baby.. -
Originally posted by carpe diem jur:so how u gotta express ur love, care, concern?? ooh yeah, and also the monthly allowance, food allowance, wardrobe allowance, entertainment allowance, blah blah blah.... ooh ya, and also SPA allowance, spa til my skin drop... hahar !!
WAH!!! So high maintenance..
*pengz n die from heart attack*
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dats oni a small section of the contract... i wun suck u dry, n worries...Originally posted by Gackt247:
WAH!!! So high maintenance..
*pengz n die from heart attack*
*slap slap.. WAKE UP!!* -
OUCH OUCH.. tt hurts larling..Originally posted by carpe diem jur:dats oni a small section of the contract... i wun suck u dry, n worries...
*slap slap.. WAKE UP!!* -
dats affection of lub, larling.... u like it??Originally posted by Gackt247:OUCH OUCH.. tt hurts larling.. -
Any form of lub lub from larling dear.. i like..Originally posted by carpe diem jur:dats affection of lub, larling.... u like it??