Text:
The eight sufferings are: birth, old age, sickness, death, the suffering of being separated from objects of love, the suffering of encountering objects of hate, the suffering of not getting what one seeks, and the suffering of the raging blaze of the five skandhas.
Commentary:
The eight sufferings are:
Birth: We are not aware of how painful the birth process is. Actually when a person is born, he feels as much pain as a cow being flayed alive, or as a live turtle getting its shell pulled off. When a baby is born, the first thing it does is cry, "Ku, ku, ku!" [In Chinese, the word ku for 'crying' ( ? ) sounds similar to the word ku for 'suffering' ( ? ).] So children experience suffering when they are first born. But after a few days, they forget about the suffering and mistake it to be happiness. So children will also smile and laugh. They think it's pretty nice, that there's no more suffering. But as they get older--passing from youth into the prime of life, and then onto old age--they experience suffering again. When they are old, they don't have the strength to chew their food or to walk, and everything becomes a hassle. That's the suffering of old age. Sickness is also a kind of suffering. When one is sick, everything one eats loses its flavor. But there is no suffering greater than that of death. The Buddha observed these four sufferings and it prompted him to leave the home-life and cultivate. There are four additional kinds of suffering: the suffering of being separated from objects of love. When you are separated from the person you love most dearly, that is this kind of suffering. When you lose your most treasured possession, you also experience this kind of suffering. If someone sets fire to your house, which you love to live in, you have this suffering. If someone steals your favorite outfit, you also have this suffering. In general, this suffering is experienced when something or someone that you are very attached to and cannot let go of is taken away from you. The suffering of encountering objects of hate. There may be someone you absolutely detest, so you decide to go somewhere else to get away from the person. But when you go to another place, you meet the same kind of person there. You hate him and loathe him, but as things turn out, you keep running into him. The suffering of not getting what one seeks. There is something you really wish to have, but you just can't obtain it. That's also a kind of suffering. The suffering of the raging blaze of the five skandhas. The five skandhas are form, feeling, thought, formations, and consciousness. They are like a roaring fire, and they also constitute a kind of suffering, although no one considers it to be suffering. Once you awaken to this kind of suffering, you'll know that it's worse than anything.
http://www.kaiwu.com/Buddhism/profiledir/hsuanhuadir/pleasureissuffering.html
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theorically perfect till you are harrassed by someone until you turn from indifferent to strong emotional feelings.
The idiot who made my life difficult pass away recently and i celebrate the demise.
Out of sight, out of mind. Good Riddance.
In my earlier post, I did mention I avoided going to a temple because someone there made life difficult for me. I told the shifu there that the next time I see her (that person) again without anger, it means I have succeeded in my practice.
I shall go to the temple again and see how I feel when seeing her. There was this young Buddhist called me the other day that she said whenever she went to that temple and saw that person, she refused to chant. She too is using her as a goal to see whether she has succeeded in her practice. We both laugh at our stupidity but what to do, afterall we are humans.
my previous senior manager, human affinity not that good. does not treat the workers very good. treat client hypocritically. most ppl dislike him. think he very smart, though he do have experience in operation, but not in managing. make the working enviro very stiff and stressful. think he also scolded by the big boss regularly, so he also scolded his subordinate. somemore a prayer of Guan Yin Pusa. guess ���,�相为谋...tot i practice my tolerance skill, but no more chance, quited and joined another better bigger company and boss. now my director said, i hire u to have fun and enjoy and be happy, not to work ur heart out. Family and health is number one. direct opposite of previous.
but here in good enviroment, it is to practice not to like it too much. as taught by MCK.
�顺境�善缘�起贪痴_�慧全现! �逆境��缘�生嗔�_业障尽消!
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What happens when you have a relative slandering you incessantly (every day or a few times a day). And I mean real slander, as in telling untruths, causing all sorts of trouble, even to the point of ill-treating my grandmother. But she goes and tells her sons that WE are ill-treating grandma and cause all sorts of quarrels, displeasure, distrust and HATRED among siblings. Calling people up between 5 to 20 times a day and cause all manner of emotional turbulence.
I came on the forum tonight for the first time in many, many days because I was so caught up with the duties of looking after my sick grandma in hospital. I was literally praying that there would be a topic I can suitably post about my problem. I didn't think there would be anywhere, or anyone I could ask for advice. And "click", I see this thread.
It was around October that in desperation I ran to Kuan Yin temple at Waterloo St. (even while knowing it's not very orthodox Buddhist) to ask for help in letting go of my dislike and hatred for this person and her sons. And I also prayed for grandma's speedy release from this Saha world and samsara (grandma's wish). Within days, I was led by chance to chant the Cunde Mantra. I slept well for the first time in days ever since I chanted. But that benefit has gone away since then, because this relative is incessantly and unrelentingly harrassing us.
This has been going on for months ever since my grandfather left grandma behind (passed away).
Today I've reached boiling stage where I feel almost ready to shoot someone.
Don't tell me to let go. It's not me who doesn't wanna let go. She's biting like a mad dog. Other relatives have also quarreled heatedly with her, to the point of wanting to hit her. My father literally had to push her physically away when she went on a ranting, raving tirade the other day.
And yes, she's already seeing a psychiatrist.
Ideas.... real solutions anyone?
Amituofo :) u never say, we never know. u seem normal online, but in reality u have problem in life. think we all have. i also only dish out 70% only. rest are also family problem and habit problem. truth do set one free. one will be happier when u are true to ur life. i tot of Buddha's last word �苦为师...may suffering be our teacher. may we leave samsara and be reborn in western pureland! may Buddha/bodhisattva be with u!
ps: the snr manager i mentioned also insult his subordinates character and family. as the old saying goes 士�����辱 rather be killed than be insulted. MCK taught if insult also can withstand, then ur cultivation is number one.
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Hi,
Let's strive to
观功念�
instead of
观过念怨
in order to become happier.
Thanks.
Cheers,
Wen Shih
lying make one's life unhappy.
This morning I woke up and renewed my resolve to overcome the negativity. Why succumb to it? Why should Mara win? If it takes chanting over and over again to purge the mental toxins, then chanting it will be. When I have some time later, maybe add prostrations to the equation. I know this relative of mine and her sons probably think I'm hypocritical and laughable, but I refuse to let them poison our hearts and minds!
Originally posted by sinweiy:Amituofo :) u never say, we never know. u seem normal online, but in reality u have problem in life. think we all have. i also only dish out 70% only. rest are also family problem and habit problem. truth do set one free. one will be happier when u are true to ur life. i tot of Buddha's last word �苦为师...may suffering be our teacher. may we leave samsara and be reborn in western pureland! may Buddha/bodhisattva be with u!
ps: the snr manager i mentioned also insult his subordinates character and family. as the old saying goes 士�����辱 rather be killed than be insulted. MCK taught if insult also can withstand, then ur cultivation is number one.
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Yeah, I guess. å…度之一是å¿�辱。
Oh yes and one of my daily dedications is for old folks like my grandma who suffer from dementia-related depression and aggression. I dedicate the merit for them to either find inner peace while still in the Saha world, or find their way to Pureland. If anyone wants to join me in this, we really, really welcome it!
Only those who have taken care of suffering dementia patients really know the difficulties. Some demented patients are very mild and they become happier than they ever were previously.... but some like my grandma, become aggressive (even spiteful) and very depressed. If my family has one such case, I can imagine that all over the world there are other old amahs and agongs like her too.
... thanks for listening!
hai... so many people also don't like. so many people behave badly.some times can move on, some time need time to even just forget. ...
I have a lot of hate in my heart.... its tough to let go.... then listen to buddhist talks and also radio talks... I realsed...
Why keep all that rubbish in the heart.... Why do we demand others to respect us.... we sould be keeping good things in our hearts instead.
Life is too short. For those who do bad things to others, when karma comes to fruition... one cannot hide. They might enjoy now but its only a matter of time.
Its easy to say but very hard to do...
Originally posted by realization:Oh yes and one of my daily dedications is for old folks like my grandma who suffer from dementia-related depression and aggression. I dedicate the merit for them to either find inner peace while still in the Saha world, or find their way to Pureland. If anyone wants to join me in this, we really, really welcome it!
Only those who have taken care of suffering dementia patients really know the difficulties. Some demented patients are very mild and they become happier than they ever were previously.... but some like my grandma, become aggressive (even spiteful) and very depressed. If my family has one such case, I can imagine that all over the world there are other old amahs and agongs like her too.
... thanks for listening!
i suffered from an idiot dementia old man who is totally unrelated to me in any way. Just an idiot neighbour who then used me to lure all his unfilial sons home to listen to his lies. Police got involved. Even went to mediation but didn't solve any problem because this idiot dementia old man could only get his attention when he created problems for me. He was aggressive and even challenged me to a fight.
I had to pray hard at my altar to let this stop. Finally he died suddenly and this stopped. I was harrassed for two years for this idiot's selfish purpose. I am just glad my prayer wish came true.
Peace resumed and the neighbour 's unfilial sons left me alone . They got into trouble with the Police though because the old idiot kept calling the Police for no good reason and nobody could stop him.
The whole family including the old wife can not look me in the eyes nowadays.
I did practice tolerance in the beginning, keep finding excuses to forgive the idiot.
The problem is one hand cannot clap alone and since the idiot insisted to create non-existing lies so that his sons, daughters and grandchildren would return to visit him, i had to suffer for two years before his death ended everyone's misery.
I didn't get any of my family members involved because i didn't want this to become two family war. I just kept mum about my sufferings. Even when a good friend wanted to meditate for me , i refused. I knew what the old idiot is up to and i didn't want anyone else to be involved in his selfish silly plots.
Sometimes old people create more problems for others than being helpful. Especially those with dementia or suffering from loneliness.
forgiving is one thing, but human affairs and issues are just too complex to explain and resolve by mere forgiveness...no doubt this is a buddhist forum...and ironically it is the vexing human affairs that leads one to question about life....
the invisible hand that touches on every aspects of our lives must see the issue ground up and not just autocratically imposing certain laws and regulations on one side for the benefit of another....
by adopting an "you-are-not-the-only-one-and-just-let-things-take-its-natural-course" attitude would increase greater injustices and delayed progresses towards what is balanced....
certain things can be forgiven....but some things must be proactively changed.....
Matthew 18:21-22
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. (NIV)
Luke 23:34
Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. (NIV)
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? ...
I forgave my army chief clerk, DXOs, bullies in my school and army and even people who are mean to me.
I am still learning how to forgive people. I still have a long way to go.
Not sure if posting bible quotes here might offend some other Buddhists, but I am personally perfectly fine with quoting other religions... and I am aware that forgiveness is something quite important in Christianity (and the whole religion is based on Jesus forgiving people)
It reminds me of my Christian bunkmate... the guy who sleeps next to him always make fun of him, he always forgive him. Then that guy once asked the Christian guy.... if I commit adultery with your wife next time, will you forgive me? He said yes. And he asked many more ridiculous questions.... (that guy who makes fun of the Christian guy keeps laughing at each answer... but I am sure the Christian guy is quite serious) he always answered in the positive.
In Buddhism, forgiveness is one of the very important paramitas (virtues) that we have to cultivate and perfect to attain Buddhahood... as some has mentioned.
Originally posted by An Eternal Now:Not sure if posting bible quotes here might offend some other Buddhists, but I am personally perfectly fine with quoting other religions... and I am aware that forgiveness is something quite important in Christianity (and the whole religion is based on Jesus forgiving people)
It reminds me of my Christian bunkmate... the guy who sleeps next to him always make fun of him, he always forgive him. Then that guy once asked the Christian guy.... if I commit adultery with your wife next time, will you forgive me? He said yes. And he asked many more ridiculous questions.... he always answered in the positive.
In Buddhism, forgiveness is one of the very important paramitas (virtues) that we have to cultivate and perfect to attain Buddhahood... as some has mentioned.
Yes forgiveness is very important to christians.
Jesus never ask us to be perfect in forgiving people but we must at least try to forgive people.
If we can do it, of cos it's even better.
Originally posted by Fcukpap:forgiving is one thing, but human affairs and issues are just too complex to explain and resolve by mere forgiveness...no doubt this is a buddhist forum...and ironically it is the vexing human affairs that leads one to question about life....
the invisible hand that touches on every aspects of our lives must see the issue ground up and not just autocratically imposing certain laws and regulations on one side for the benefit of another....
by adopting an "you-are-not-the-only-one-and-just-let-things-take-its-natural-course" attitude would increase greater injustices and delayed progresses towards what is balanced....
certain things can be forgiven....but some things must be proactively changed.....
Originally posted by An Eternal Now:Not sure if posting bible quotes here might offend some other Buddhists, but I am personally perfectly fine with quoting other religions... and I am aware that forgiveness is something quite important in Christianity (and the whole religion is based on Jesus forgiving people)
It reminds me of my Christian bunkmate... the guy who sleeps next to him always make fun of him, he always forgive him. Then that guy once asked the Christian guy.... if I commit adultery with your wife next time, will you forgive me? He said yes. And he asked many more ridiculous questions.... (that guy who makes fun of the Christian guy keeps laughing at each answer... but I am sure the Christian guy is quite serious) he always answered in the positive.
In Buddhism, forgiveness is one of the very important paramitas (virtues) that we have to cultivate and perfect to attain Buddhahood... as some has mentioned.
Buddhism teaches wisdom. I guess we also have to use our wisdom to forgive. I'm not criticising Christianity but I'm quoting a real life example which happened in Singapore many years ago and you guys tell me is this the right way to forgive.
Many years ago, there was a young lady from a Christian family was raped and murdered. I couldn't remember the family posted in her obituary or told the reporter that they had forgiven the rapist because of their religion. They said this just days after the case and before the rapist got caught ,repented or felt regretted. Don't you think the rapist will be even more daring and go round committing crimes thinking that what he had committed was nothing serious. The family's statement could even encourage potential rapists.
the invisible hand refers to one or group in power...
again, it is not the passivity of buddhism i m getting at, that is not my point....
i m referring to different perspectives and how systems could affect lives and how this could be proactively changed in a manner other than from religious perspectives which nothing could be done but self reflect ...
different roles different ways to resolving problems - some things can be forgiven, some things need to be changed that leads to progresses....religions are bystanders or observers of such change
Originally posted by Dawnfirstlight:Buddhism teaches wisdom. I guess we also have to use our wisdom to forgive. I'm not criticising Christianity but I'm quoting a real life example which happened in Singapore many years ago and you guys tell me is this the right way to forgive.
Many years ago, there was a young lady from a Christian family got raped. I couldn't remember the family posted in her obituary or told the reporter that they had forgiven the rapist. They said this just days after the case and before the rapist got caught ,repented or felt regretted. Don't you think the rapist will be even more daring and go round committing crimes thinking that what he had committed was nothing serious. The family's statement could even encourage potential rapists.