The Dark Room (Please ignore this thread)
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11:35pm 12 Feb 2004
AT: What am I doing here?
DP: I bring you here.
AT: Do you know what you are doing?
DP: Yes, very well.
AT: You are crazy.
AT: I donÂ’t think it is a wise thing to do, it is stupid.
DP: ItÂ’s okay, beside; I wonÂ’t reply any of the postings here. I've
already request them to ignore this thread.
AT: But people can still view this.
DP: So?
AT: I am not comfortable here. You know I canÂ’t hide in here.
DP: Why should you hide?
AT: I created you remember? I created you to escape from the real world.
DP: I know and I am trying my best not to disappoint you.
AT: I am getting out of here.
DP: Why not give it a try for a few weeks. No harm trying.
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…..
DP: Remember? You created me, you can also kill me.
AT: I think you are right. But let me warn you, if you try anything funnyÂ…Â…..
DP: I know, you will kill me.
AT: So what do you want from me?
DP: Nothing, just be yourself.
AT: I am different from you, I can't be myself. I am not sure which is the real me. I plays too many different roles.
DP: And I am one of them?
AT: Yes, you are one of them.
DP: So am I real?
AT: No, you are not real.
DP: Â…Â…Â…..but you created me based on your characters.
AT: Not all of it. There are some parts of you in me.
DP: Thanks.
AT: You are welcome.
DP: Look I am not trying to embarrass you in front of the whole world. I just thought it might be a good idea for you to come here occasionally to chitchat with me.
AT: I guess you are right, I donÂ’t mean to be rude earlier.
DP: ItÂ’s okay.
AT: Do you think that the people here will think that we are crazy?
DP: So?
AT: You know very well, there are people here who know our real identities.
DP: So be it.
AT: You are not worry?
DP: Why should I? In here I am known as DP, a faceless individual created by you.
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…..
AT: Talks to you some other times, I am tired.
DP: You are always tired.
AT: Try living in the real world.
DP: ...................
DP: Okay, I am going to check out my other posts. Hey donÂ’t log me out yet.
AT: I wonÂ’t.
DP: See you. -
argh..curiosity kill the cat...
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1:44 am, 13 Feb 2004
AT: DP, are you still around?
DP: Yup!
AT: You are forever so cheerfulÂ…Â…Â…
DP: I thought you are going to sleep?
AT: CanÂ’t sleep. Been thinking.
DP: About?
AT: Life, career, relationships, etcÂ…. nothing seems right.
DP: Hi, cheer up, life is not so bad right?
AT: You wonÂ’t understandÂ…Â….
DP: Yeah, I am only part of you, right?
AT: Â…Â…. no lahÂ…Â….
DP: Tell you what, if you are sad or are having problems you can always come here and tell me.
AT: Thanks. By the way, ‘The Dark Room’, nice name.
DP: Thanks, both of us like to sit in the dark right. This is a fact.
AT: But I am still not comfortable here.
DP: You will get used to it. The folks here are quite nice. Beside, you have me.
AT: People must be thinking we are crazy.
DP: You know what, the problem with you is that you worry too much. Relax.
AT: Maybe you are right. I am going to sleep now, need to wake up at 6.45am tomorrow.
DP: Me too, I am logging out soon.
AT: Good night, DP.
DP: Good night, AT.
DP: Good night to all of you who are reading this.
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sounds schizo... then again... sounds like me... kakakaka
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hmm
which one of me do you want to talk to?
the guy or the gal? -
6:06pm 13 Feb 2004
AT: Hey, DP.
DP: Hey, you are early today.
AT: Yeah, today is my half-day off.
DP: Your half-day off is on Friday?
AT: For the time being, I work irregular hours.
AT: Nice place you have here.
DP: Thank you. You created me, and I created DPS.
AT: DPSÂ…Â…Â…Â…. our dream. HmmÂ…. Everything seems to be on track.
DP: Yup. Thanks to the helps of some friends here.
AT: Who are KittynMeow and MetalGear?
DP: They are my fellow moderators. Thanks to them, everything is in perfect order.
AT: But who are they? I mean, you donÂ’t even know how they look like.
DP: Is it important?
AT: Why not? As friends I think it is necessary.
DP: I disagree, so what if IÂ’ve never met them before? As long as the feeling is right, it is not necessary to know how the other parties look like.
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…..
DP: It is the feeling and thoughts that count.
AT: I still think that you are too naïve.
DP: I trust them.
AT: IÂ’ve got nothing to say.
DP: You must learn to have some faith in mankind.
AT: This is so ironic; I am talking to my own creation and he is telling me to have faith in mankind, ha!
DP: I am your friend; I may be your only friend in this whole wide world.
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â….
AT: So…………….., you have created ‘The Dark Room’ just for me?
DP: Yup. A place for you to chitchat and for others to post their comments too.
AT: But I thought you asked them to ignore this thread? I thought this place is only for us?
DP: I promised you I will not reply to their postings here, but they are free to comment if they wish to.
AT: Why are you doing this? I am supposed to be invisible, unknown Â…Â…Â…..
DP: Because you need help. There is only so much I can do for you. There are many people here who are more experienced them me. You will benefit from their advice.
AT: I donÂ’t need any adviceÂ…Â…Â….
DP: Yes you do. Admit it.
AT: I donÂ’t need any adviceÂ…Â…Â….
DP: DonÂ’t be so stubborn.
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…..
DP: WhatÂ’s the harm of trying?
AT: You better be right.
DP: Trust me. Trust the people here. We are all here to help.
AT: Â…Â…Â….. I Â…Â…Â…Â… donÂ’t know.
DP: Have an open mind my friend.
AT: I will try. Talk to you later.
DP: Okay. See you. -
AT is beginning to sound like my "brother"...... both Tare's and mine...
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Are you dead yet?Originally posted by Bochupi:argh..curiosity kill the cat... -
This should be renamed the Dead Poet Monologues
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12:46 am 15 Feb 2004
AT: Hi, DP.
DP: Hello, happy Valentine Day AT!
AT: It is past midnight, anyway what so happy about Valentine Day.
DP: Why? Been thinking about her again?
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…
DP: Let me see, how long was it? 8 years? 10 years?
AT: 14 years.
DP: 14 years is a long time.
AT: She was my first love.
DP: Ha, donÂ’t tell me you do not have any relationship before her?
AT: I do have, but she is the first woman that I wanted to start a family with.
DP: ???
AT: Those before her, I had no such strong feeling, but when I was with her, I really wanted her to be my wife, not just as a girlfriend.
DP: So she is your first love?
AT: Yes.
DP: And you still think about her?
AT: SometimesÂ…Â….not reallyÂ…Â…..
DP: You are marriedÂ…Â…Â…Â…
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…
DP: It is not fair to your wife.
AT: I know.
DP: Do you love your wife?
AT: Very much.
DP: Then stop thinking about her! Your ex, she is history!
AT: It is not something I can control, sometimes she appears in my dream.
DP: You must be fair to your wife.
AT: I know.
DP: You are a selfish asshole, you know that!
AT: Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…Â…..
DP: Man, I give up on you!
AT: I need times.
DP: 14 years, my friend, isnÂ’t it long enough!
AT: Can I leave?
DP: You are running away again, as usual.
AT: I am leavingÂ…Â…
DP: Coward!
DP: She is history man! You have a wife! You are a loser! A coward! I am damn disappointed in you.....damn disappointed..... oh why am I crying...... -
DP: AT, are you there?
AT: YeahÂ…I am around.
DP: I wish to apologize to you.
AT: Apologize for what?
DP: I shouldnÂ’t shout at you yesterday.
AT: ItÂ’s okay, beside you are right, I am a loser.
DP: DonÂ’t say that, I am suppose to help you, but I end up making you feel more miserable instead.
AT: The truth is always bitter.
DP: I am surprise you didn’t ‘kill’ me.
AT: I am not so petty.
DP: Tell you what; you are most welcome to come here to chitchat with me. If you have any problems you can also let me know, if I canÂ’t help you there are people here who can.
AT: I will consider.
DP: You will not regret this.
AT: I hope so, by the way on a lighter note; now everyone knows that you are married.
DP: That is incorrect. AT is married, DP is not. I am single and unattached. I am still available.
AT: I donÂ’t know whether to cry or laugh.
DP: Haha, you donÂ’t have to envy me, remember I exist because you exist.
AT: ThatÂ’s true. So you can continue to be your bachelor hereÂ….
DP: Which is something you can only dream about.
AT: I have better dream.
DP: Frankly speaking, do you still think about her? 14 years is a long time you know.
AT: Like IÂ’ve said, I donÂ’t consciously think about her. IÂ’ve buried her deep inside my heart, my memory. But occasionally I do dreamt about her, but as times passes such dreams are getting fewer and fewer. It is only when I accidentally bumped into her, memories of the past began to reappear to haunt me.
DP: But if you have really gotten over her, these memories should no longer haunt you.
AT: You have a point there. So maybe, a small part of me is still fighting back, still refusing to accept the reality.
DP: HmmÂ… it seems that one can never really forgets about his/her first love.
AT: I am glad you understand.
DP: But not forgetting doesnÂ’t mean you must continue to hang on to it. You must move on. Nothing in this world is constant, maybe expect changes. See this in a different perspective, see this as just a chapter in your Book of Life. See this as part of growing up. Most importantly, you are now married; you have a new role to play with new responsibilities. I think you know what I mean.
AT: I know.
DP: Let's stop here, I need to check my other posts.
AT: Sure, you go ahead and do what you must do.
DP: Okay. See you.
AT: See you. -
Me, myself and I...
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DP: Are you okay, you donÂ’t look good.
AT: My whole life is crumbling and I donÂ’t know what are the causes.
DP: What exactly is the problem?
AT: Everything! Works, relationship, financial, the meaning of my existence in this world, etcÂ…
DP: Wah! CanÂ’t you tackle your problems part by part?
AT: How to?
DP: For example, you can solve your problems at work first, then proceed to tackle your relationship problem, and so on.
AT: It is not that simple.
DP: Nothing in this world is simple; you need to take the first step.
AT: Sometimes all I need is someone beside me, listening to me.
DP: You need a listening ear?
AT: Some sort like that. Actually, he/she may not even have to say anything, just be by my side will do.
DP: You are feeling lonely?
AT: Maybe.
DP: What about your wife? CanÂ’t you talk to her?
AT: No, she is part of the problem.
DP: You are having marriage problem?
AT: In a way, yes.
DP: Want to tell me what is the problem?
AT: Not here.
DP: This is sad. How long have you two been together?
AT: What do you mean by being together? As couple, ROM, living together?
DP: As couple.
AT: About 13 years.
DP: That is a long time.
AT: Hey I donÂ’t want to talk about her too much online.
DP: Is the problem so bad?
AT: What problem are you talking about?
DP: Your marriage.
AT: We are thinking of having a divorce.
DP: Will that solve your problem?
AT: Maybe some of it. My life has not been happy for the past couple of years.
DP: And you are blaming it on your marriage?
AT: Not all of it.
DP: Happiness is a question of your mindset. You can choose to be or not to be happy.
AT: I know. But if you put it to practice, it is not that easy.
DP: Did you try?
AT: Yes, IÂ’ve tried my best.
DP: So you are going to divorce?
AT: I am not sure yet.
DP: This is sad.
AT: I know. But sometimes you have to do what is necessary.
DP: I donÂ’t like the idea of divorce.
AT: Neither do I. Anyway, we are still trying to save our marriage.
DP: You do that my friend, you do that.
AT: I will. I just hope we will have a happy ending.
DP: That will depends on both of you.
AT: A happy ending does not mean we remain as husband and wife. Maybe both of us will be happier if we go separate ways.
DP: Try to work things out brother.
AT: I will, but it needs two hands to clap.
DP: Anyway good luck.
AT: Thanks. -
AT: 3:22am, canÂ’t sleep.
AT: Super bored.
DP: WhatÂ’s up?
AT: Do know how long I can take it.
DP: Your marriage?
AT: No, my work.
DP: What about it?
AT: I think it is time to move on. Need to get a better job.
DP: DonÂ’t like your present one?
AT: Something like that.
DP: No job in this world is perfect you know.
AT: But that doesnÂ’t mean I must stop looking for better prospect.
DP: You are still doing your part-time degree, am I right?
AT: Yes, this year final year.
DP: In that case, I suggest you hold on to your present job until you graduate.
AT: Sigh, that will be another 10 more months.
DP: You can do it one. Beside you havenÂ’t found any new job yet right?
AT: I donÂ’t know what exactly I want. ThatÂ’s the main problem.
DP: What do you like?
AT: Talking to people, helping them, anything that deals with people.
DP: Too vague.
AT: Not sure lah. Maybe a social worker? PsychologistÂ’s assistant? I donÂ’t know.
DP: Take your time, do some research, talk to people.
AT: I guess that is the only thing I can do now.
DP: HowÂ’s your relationship with your wife?
AT: What do you think? I am not asleep but talking to you at 3:35am in the morning.
DP: Both of you still sleep on the same bed right?
AT: Yes.
DP: Think positive.
AT: I will try. We have to work something out soon.
DP: Funny thing, you want to help people, be a social worker, yet you canÂ’t help yourself.
AT: I know, very ironic right?
DP: Life itself is ironic.
AT: I know what you mean, the moment we were born we are actually moving towards the arms of Death.
DP: Yup. Black and White, Sun and Moon, Evil and Good, Life and Death, Love and Hate. If you accept the first half, you must prepare to accept the other half.
AT: Life and Death Â…Â…Â…Awake and Sleep.........
DP: Try to get some sleep.
AT: If Life is to be awake, then to sleep is to die.
DP: What are you talking about??? You think too much liao.
AT: Hahaha, I am going crazy liao.
AT: Okay going to die now.
DP: Crazy fool, sigh......... -
AT: Hey DP, this is something new, you look sad.
DP: Not really lah, just a little bit disappointed.
AT: What is it about?
DP: I wrote a poem to your colleague.
AT: Okay, you told about that before.
DP: It was my first poem after 12 years.
AT: Okay, and then?
DP: She doesnÂ’t appreciate it.
DP: She was supposed to post her comments to let me know how she feels about it.
AT: ErÂ….. she didnÂ’t?
DP: None, not even an sms to tell me how she feels about it.
AT: Maybe she is busy, you know we are all very busy nowadays, especially the ISO rubbish is just around the corner.
DP: I know, but I still feel a bit let down.
AT: You are not in love with her are you?
DP: Of course not! We are just friend.
AT: You are married you know.
DP: Correction, YOU are married, not me. I am still single and available.
AT: Yeah yeah yeah, whatever you say.
DP: Look, she is only a friend, I have no other motives.
AT: Okay, maybe youÂ’ve pissed her off somewhere in the poem?
DP: Like what?
AT: I donÂ’t know, you wrote it, why ask me?
DP: HmmmÂ…Â….
AT: Maybe she thinks that you were being busybody.
DP: MaybeÂ…Â….
AT: Or she thinks that you have nothing better to do.
AT: Or she thinks that you are making fun of her.
AT: Or she thinks that Â…Â…..
DP: Okay, okay, I get your point.
AT: Hahaha!
DP: Idiot. So now how?
AT: What how? Forget it lah! What can you do? Write her another poem?
DP: I am not that stupid okay!
AT: Think she will be reading this now?
DP: Most likely not. Anyway I donÂ’t care liao.
AT: You know something?
DP: What?
AT: I am really enjoying this, hahaha.
DP: Idiot.
AT: By the way, the title of the poem also sounds funny.
DP: KNS.
AT: Bye bye. -
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AT: Hello DP.
DP: Hey AT, long time no see.
AT: Been busy with works, as usual.
DP: I am curious, what kind of person are you?
AT: Me? Why do you want to know?
DP: I hate this question.
AT: Okay, okay. HmmÂ… I think I am a boring person.
DP: Why do you say that?
AT: I hate games, donÂ’t talk much, you know, the quiet type.
DP: But your job required you to talk to people right?
AT: Yeah thatÂ’s true but after work I tend to keep my mouth shut if I can help it.
DP: What about with your friends?
AT: Of course with my friends different story lah, I do open up a bit with them. But my idea of having a good time is just keeping quiet and enjoying each other's company.
DP: You are really weird you know that.
AT: I am actually a friendly person lah. You need to know me better mah.
DP: Okay what other weird habits you have?
AT: Like for example I donÂ’t like playing games, I prefer to have my meals alone at work, etc.
DP: So, you donÂ’t have lunch/dinner with your colleagues?
AT: No. Only occasionally I dine with them. To me meal time is personal time.
DP: What about having coffee?
AT: Oh, that is different. Coffee I don't mind.
DP: You are quite anti-social hor?
AT: A bit lah. ThatÂ’s why my friends ask me how can you be studying Psychology when you are so anti-social? Well, why not?
DP: Indeed you are really a boring guy.
AT: It takes time to know me. Usually people donÂ’t have the time to do so.
DP: Either they like you or hate you?
AT: Something like that. That’s why I only have a few friends and those, I’ve know them for 12 – 15 years liao.
DP: But first impression is very important you know?
AT: What to do. I usually give others a not so friendly first impression. A one to one date with me is a nightmare for the other party.
DP: Er Â… why is that so?
AT: Because there will be many silent moments. I prefer to observe rather than talk. That is why I usually meet people in a group, seldom one to one.
DP: Silence is golden mah.
AT: But not when you are meeting people. Actually I am not feeling bored lah, just nothing to say.
DP: Oic.
AT: To be frank, I am enjoy just simply by looking at other people doing the talking.
DP: HmmÂ…so no outings for you!
AT: Not at the moment lah. Maybe next year. Even so, I will prefer a small group like 3-5 persons?
DP: Okay I will keep that in mind. -
i really like this....cool & creative.