Survey on Long Distance relationships
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i went away for almost 2 years, with my girl full blessing.Originally posted by F.O.S:Long Distance relationship in this topic means a couple together for 2 years and the guy needs to work overseas for 2 years.
Is there any similar cases that in the end really happly ever after?
In the guy point of view I think career is important, without career I can't provide a better living for my family.
For the gal's view is why there is a stable job in Singapore earning a decent living and she don't require the guy to be very rich.
My question are :
Guy should go or stay
Gal should give in or insist
how many % the guy will have misterss
how many % the gal will be unfaithful?
Needed both equal number of guys and gals to give the answer.
the girl visited once in a while. i went home once in a while.
i wasn't exactly pristine in my faithfulness to her but nothing big. dinner here, movie there, but nothing sexual.
she cheated on me and went off with another guy. some things are just not meant to be. -
thats is what I afraid of. sighOriginally posted by Fuqua:i went away for almost 2 years, with my girl full blessing.
the girl visited once in a while. i went home once in a while.
i wasn't exactly pristine in my faithfulness to her but nothing big. dinner here, movie there, but nothing sexual.
she cheated on me and went off with another guy. some things are just not meant to be.
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guess i have let u being disappointed...Originally posted by F.O.S:I guess you are a guy, usually a gal has such thinking is a string and career woman. very rare.
im a gal
i think a careera is impt to a guy, a job can be found everywhere, but a job that you like is hard to find...
grab whatever opportunites you have... dun let golden eggs slip by.. you will regret.. really -
If the above really happen in your life, you really will let him go ? Job can find everywhere, a gal that I love is not everywhere.Originally posted by Pubosai:guess i have let u being disappointed...
im a gal
i think a careera is impt to a guy, a job can be found everywhere, but a job that you like is hard to find...
grab whatever opportunites you have... dun let golden eggs slip by.. you will regret.. really
Just a discussion, I might sounds funny. I just need to know the different incident , different thinking and all different way that will happen. -
when she left, i regretted going away .. for a long time.Originally posted by F.O.S:thats is what I afraid of. sigh
the job was fantastic but i thought, if only i stayed, i wouldn't have lost her.
but i'm at a better place now. So looking back at it, her leaving me, much as it hurts at that time, was truly a blessing in disguise. -
2 yrs study overseas - really not a long time, no big deal. Now with cheap airfares, IDD calls & internet, easy to stay in touch.
I know of many cases where fathers are working long term overseas & families in S'pore due to kid's studies. This is a more worrying trend as the family bond won't be so strong.
A family I know (mum + 2 kids) went to Perth cos S'pore edn. too stressful, left behind the dad in S'pore. The kids will be there for at least 3- 5 yrs. They already speak with Australian accent, don't think they will want to come back. -
It happen to me once similar to yours, will write it out and post later.Originally posted by Fuqua:when she left, i regretted going away .. for a long time.
the job was fantastic but i thought, if only i stayed, i wouldn't have lost her.
but i'm at a better place now. So looking back at it, her leaving me, much as it hurts at that time, was truly a blessing in disguise. -
my guy is posted to Philippines for 5yrs... so arent u blessed that yours is only for 2yrs?? i couldnt bear to let him go initally but managed to think it through that it will be selfish of me not to let him venture out there.. now we are heading towards the 3rd yr...Originally posted by F.O.S:If the above really happen in your life, you really will let him go ? Job can find everywhere, a gal that I love is not everywhere.
Just a discussion, I might sounds funny. I just need to know the different incident , different thinking and all different way that will happen.
basically what i think it the trust must be there.. though said easy... doing it is tough..
constantly keep in touch through calls or mails... visit her back in spore when u have the time, ask her to visit u if she can..
cheers -
[quote]Originally posted by F.O.S:
Long Distance relationship in this topic means a couple together for 2 years and the guy needs to work overseas for 2 years.
Is there any similar cases that in the end really happly ever after?'
[b]
most cases dn last long
In the guy point of view I think career is important, without career I can't provide a better living for my family. correct if the guy wana go, let him go...if he's urs he will come back to u...let him go purse his dreams..
For the gal's view is why there is a stable job in Singapore earning a decent living and she don't require the guy to be very rich. for me i tink most impt is the guy decision...if its someting he wans, the girl cant stop him...if nt, in future will regret somehw..
My question are :
Guy should go or stay
Gal should give in or insist
how many % the guy will have misterss
how many % the gal will be unfaithful?
Needed both equal number of guys and gals to give the answer. tink most cases the girl will cry n cry when the guy wana go....and most cases..the guy will b in a delima....to go or nt....
% misterss? this depends on the new environment he go to....is he v busy always or alot free time..if so confirm will b lonely....bt if can entertain himself ok lor..if nt..then somehw will go n b more socialise..
% unfaithful ? depends on fate aso see if sky gt drop any better guys down or see the girl tinkin mature or childish...if she is independent then ok ...go busy working or learning..occupy her 2 yrs...if nt ...she realy lonely..then mayb will step to another relationship
aiya FOS u nt young anymore....go get married & give birth lar....then no need to go liao lor..lolz bt if its realy ur ambition...then u shld go lor..
bt i can say....long distance relationships is nt realy stable...v low percent mayb 30% successful case...mus see if the couple is v stable ? or nt stable...?mayb will turn out to be better learn to cherish each other more or turn worst lor...alot miscommunications...
aiya best is both go together lor -
I was a Civil Engineering draftman back in the past in 1996, some how due to another relationship I quitted my job and not been working for a year. ( another story, will tell you guys next time.)
I knew a gal which is 7 years younger than me and our relationship last for 3 years. She is from a rich family educated studying her ‘A’ level. Her family was not happy with me because I am skinny, ‘O’ level and most important not from family that match their status. Specially her mum always bring her to meet all the rich man and son trying to match make them.
She is after me and she is willing to give herself against her family to be with me, I decided to turn over a leaf and starts all over again in IT as a sales, earning a salary of $500. I stay back every evening help the technical engineer to setup new PC, trouble shoot to learn the technical stuffs with not extra money. During that time she is having her school holiday working part time in a bank earning $1500 per month, she donÂ’t need the money and she use her money to support me.
After few month of training, and she has gone back to school our life change. I manage to get in a bigger company as a System Engineer and Network Engineer within 6 months and She entered NUS. My Job has taken my time more and more and that mean less and less time for her.
She has more and more functions and parties, and always come back with lots of stories. Who and who is after her, doctors, lawyerÂ…Â….
Ended up she left me with a ‘O’ level guy which own Fishing tackle shop in Changi Village given by the guy’s father.
Now and then I still see the guy smiling to me when I walk pass his shop, because before I knew they were together my gf actually introduce him as her sworn brother and brought me to his shop to buy fishing rod which I am still using it now.
Moral of the above story : if your career is not stable donÂ’t step in relationship, its very fragile. ItÂ’s a waste of time, although she loves me and support me but she gave me up because she canÂ’t wait to see my success.
Whats the point of stepping into relationship which is only left you with sorrow and pain?
How many of the similar relationship really ended happily ever afterÂ….? -
Again itÂ’s a 3 years relationship, just before the above story I mentioned.
We had everything in common, my family and friends likes her. Both of us after a year of relationship started to save money for marriage, she save up all her salary and both of uses mine salary for expenses, during that time she took a part time account class in the weekend for half a year. After the course I found out that she has been getting very close to a classmate and start to lie for going pubs with him. I do not know how long they have been together till I found out and I finally win her heart back. It took me 7 months to mend my broken heart and regain my trust towards her. During that 7 months since she has finish her course, she claim that she would like to work thing out with me and start to find her “sworn brother” which owns a shop selling shoes to work as part time help him. They knew each other for many year during her secondary school they used to work together for other company, the guy is 9 years older than her.
I was teaching canoe on every Sunday and will visit her to help her to close shop. She always would take money from the cashier to buy me dinner and sometimes borrow car from him and we go for ride.
When we reach the final 3rd year , we decide to get married. On my birthday I propose to her and she agreed. We start to talk about our future and suddenly I pop out a question. “Do you have any thing in your mind that you think we must discuss before we really regret ?”
She reply “Yes, I always wanted to tell you but I afraid to lost you, I am mistress of my sworn brother” -
/me played Bu LIAO Qing with her Er hu...
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Everytime eat lunch wit FOS can learn alot one i tell u all...his ren shen jin yan so feng fu....he spend 3 yrs to learn i spend 1 hr
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If you go through once you learn even moreOriginally posted by Ah Ma:Everytime eat lunch wit FOS can learn alot one i tell u all...his ren shen jin yan so feng fu....he spend 3 yrs to learn i spend 1 hr 
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no thnks...me no time....me already v mature liaoOriginally posted by F.O.S:If you go through once you learn even more -
Agree... those disappointment and pain mus go thru then can fully feel.Originally posted by F.O.S:If you go through once you learn even more
But then again, maybe not all the time things will turn out bad....maybe this time round ....it turn out to be the right one for you?... Stay positive.
Think 4ward...not backward.
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Love is an investment
If love goes high you keep and hoping it to go higher,
when it goes down a little you hold and hope it will quickly rise to the break even level.
If love keeps going downwards you must learn to cut lost at minimum.
ever heard of hatch?(don't know I get the correct spelling or not? :mrgreen
figure it out yourself -
Not always true...Originally posted by F.O.S:Love is an investment
If love goes high you keep and hoping it to go higher,
when it goes down a little you hold and hope it will quickly rise to the break even level.
If love keeps going downwards you must learn to cut lost at minimum.
ever heard of hatch?(don't I get the correct spelling? :mrgreen
figure it out yourself
It is this sort of investment only if you see it as it is.... -
2 years is actually not long mah....
i dunno abt the rest of u... but if my partner thinks that it is a good chance for him to venture out, i wun stop him... cos likewise, i wun want him to stop me either.... i dun want him to stay here and think of all the what if...
if the relationship really cannot withstand the distance and time, maybe it was meant to be?? it's not as relationship will not soured even if u r in singapore....
but then again, it's up to the person involved to decide and weigh what he thinks is more impt.... -
You should know where things are going... Don't have to be all pessimestic though? End of the day when relationship don't work out.. At least you should know life would still work out somehow...Originally posted by F.O.S:I was a Civil Engineering draftman back in the past in 1996, some how due to another relationship I quitted my job and not been working for a year. ( another story, will tell you guys next time.)
I knew a gal which is 7 years younger than me and our relationship last for 3 years. She is from a rich family educated studying her ‘A’ level. Her family was not happy with me because I am skinny, ‘O’ level and most important not from family that match their status. Specially her mum always bring her to meet all the rich man and son trying to match make them.
She is after me and she is willing to give herself against her family to be with me, I decided to turn over a leaf and starts all over again in IT as a sales, earning a salary of $500. I stay back every evening help the technical engineer to setup new PC, trouble shoot to learn the technical stuffs with not extra money. During that time she is having her school holiday working part time in a bank earning $1500 per month, she donÂ’t need the money and she use her money to support me.
After few month of training, and she has gone back to school our life change. I manage to get in a bigger company as a System Engineer and Network Engineer within 6 months and She entered NUS. My Job has taken my time more and more and that mean less and less time for her.
She has more and more functions and parties, and always come back with lots of stories. Who and who is after her, doctors, lawyerÂ…Â….
Ended up she left me with a ‘O’ level guy which own Fishing tackle shop in Changi Village given by the guy’s father.
Now and then I still see the guy smiling to me when I walk pass his shop, because before I knew they were together my gf actually introduce him as her sworn brother and brought me to his shop to buy fishing rod which I am still using it now.
Moral of the above story : if your career is not stable donÂ’t step in relationship, its very fragile. ItÂ’s a waste of time, although she loves me and support me but she gave me up because she canÂ’t wait to see my success.
Whats the point of stepping into relationship which is only left you with sorrow and pain?
How many of the similar relationship really ended happily ever afterÂ….? -
Agree with blue...Originally posted by coolger03:2 years is actually not long mah....
i dunno abt the rest of u... but if my partner thinks that it is a good chance for him to venture out, i wun stop him... cos likewise, i wun want him to stop me either.... i dun want him to stay here and think of all the what if...
if the relationship really cannot withstand the distance and time, maybe it was meant to be?? it's not as relationship will not soured even if u r in singapore....
but then again, it's up to the person involved to decide and weigh what he thinks is more impt.... -
Hedge.
I agree that when the relationships isn't meant to be... better to cut losses than hang on.Originally posted by F.O.S:Love is an investment
If love goes high you keep and hoping it to go higher,
when it goes down a little you hold and hope it will quickly rise to the break even level.
If love keeps going downwards you must learn to cut lost at minimum.
ever heard of hatch?(don't know I get the correct spelling or not? :mrgreen
figure it out yourself -
maybe you just dun feel confident to make the decision at the moment becos of wat happen in the past...kinda make u feel unsure...
Like i say, work things out wif her..tok it over. Decide on wat best. The rest, if it's meant to happen, will happen eventually. Worrying about it too much won't helps either.
Still U call the shots cos it's ur life. And when you had made a decision...Dun tok abt regrets anymore. -
this is a good piece of words... fully agree.Originally posted by Devil1976:You should know where things are going... Don't have to be all pessimestic though? End of the day when relationship don't work out.. At least you should know life would still work out somehow...