Honeys & bees.....
-
A family is driving through town. The son looks over and asks his father, “Dad, is it OK for us guys to notice all the different kinds of boobs?”
Surprised, the dad answers, “Well, sure son… we wouldn’t be normal if we didn’t. There are all kinds of boobs…. Depends on a woman’s age. In her twenties, a woman’s boobs are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. But after fifty, they are like onions.
“Onions, Dad?”
“Yeah, you see them and they make you cry.” -
Not to be outdone, the daughter asks her mother, “Mom, how many kinds of boy “thingies” are there?”
The mother, delighted to have equal time, answers, “Well dear, a man goes through 3 phrases. In a man twenties, a man ‘thingies” is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. But after his fifties,, it is like a Christmas tree.”
“A Christmas tree?”
“Yap... Dried up, and the balls are only there for decorations.” -
-
Women:
A wife was not at home for a whole night. So, the very next morning, she tells her husband that she stayed at her girlfriend's apartment over night.
The husband calls 10 of her best girlfriends, and none of them confirms that.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Men:
A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the very next morning, that he stayed at his friend's apartment over night.
So the wife calls 10 of his best friends : 5 of them confirm that he stayed at their apartments that night, and the other 5 are claiming that he still is there with them !
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Conclusion:
Men are better friends !!!!
-
Men are better friends but poor liars????
-
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM."
He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
'Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.'
God may have created man before woman, but
there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.