Two Year Degree for Men
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Kakakakaa... this is farnee......
Two Year Degree for men
For those of you who are married, were married, or are
contemplating marriage - under the assumption that men need (or
ought) to be trained for marriage, Southwest Tech is offering a new 2 year associates degree....
TWO YEAR DEGREE: Becoming a Real Man. That's right, in
just six mini-mesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as
earn an associates degree in MA (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.
FIRST YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101 Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103 PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104 We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas
Winter Schedule:
MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 2AM
MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A What's Hers is Hers
Spring Schedule:
MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like a Buttface When You're Wrong
MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C What Was Yours is Hers
SECOND YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103 How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201 How to Pu! t the Toilet Seat Down Elective (See Electives
Below)
Winter Schedule:
MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213 Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important
Spring Schedule:
MEN 220 Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2
Course Electives:
EAT 101 Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102 Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103 Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231 Mothers-in-law
MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233 Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C Cheaper to Keep Her
Just a thought for all the women o! ut there...MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause.... Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?...and when we have real trouble, it's a HISterectomy. -
Not bad quite farny!
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These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line but the least romantic second line:
Here goes......
Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.
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Oh loving beauty, you float with grace
If only you could hide your face.
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Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
This describes everything you are not.
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I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
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I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
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My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.
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I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.
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My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
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My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "Go To Hell".
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Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
empty and so is your head
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What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
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hahahhaa... this reminds me of Scary Movie 2Originally posted by :I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
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Yar yar! thats my fav quote!
Ever heard about the paper bag usage?
If the girl is ugly, use 1 paper bag to cover her face!
If the girl is ugly and gross, use 2nd paper bag to cover face!
If the girl is ugly and gross and everything is gross, use 3rd paper bag to puke!