Post A Joke Daily
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Everyone share jokes with folks here
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yesterday i walk walk walk, bio a sibei chio bu.. then knock onto lamppost...
*laugh everyone, i am telling a joke* -
A young Indian boy came back to the reservation for a family visit after his first year at college. When his dad asked him about his first year at school, he said: I'm having trouble with people making fun of me, especially my Indian name. How did you come to give your children such odd names"?
His father said: "When your brother was born, I looked out the teepee and I saw an eagle flying so I named him Little Eagle and when your sister was born, I looked out the teepee and saw a deer grazing, so I named her Spotted Fawn. Why do you ask, Two Dogs Humping"? -
Originally posted by Seacucumber:yesterday i walk walk walk, bio a sibei chio bu.. then knock onto lamppost...
*laugh everyone, i am telling a joke* -
not funnie lehOriginally posted by Seacucumber:yesterday i walk walk walk, bio a sibei chio bu.. then knock onto lamppost...
*laugh everyone, i am telling a joke* -
ahahahaha, got some more??Originally posted by the Bear:A young Indian boy came back to the reservation for a family visit after his first year at college. When his dad asked him about his first year at school, he said: I'm having trouble with people making fun of me, especially my Indian name. How did you come to give your children such odd names"?
His father said: "When your brother was born, I looked out the teepee and I saw an eagle flying so I named him Little Eagle and when your sister was born, I looked out the teepee and saw a deer grazing, so I named her Spotted Fawn. Why do you ask, Two Dogs Humping"? -
okay.. given the go-ahead
A couple married for ten years were revisiting the same places they went to on their honeymoon.
Driving through the secluded countryside, they passed a ranch with a tall deer fence running along the road.
The woman said, "Sweetheart, let's do the same thing we did here ten years ago."
The guy stopped the car. His wife backed against the fence, and he immediately jumped her bones like he was just let out of jail. They made love like never before.
Back in the car, the guy says, "Darlin', you never moved like that ten years ago - or any time since that I can remember!"
The woman says, "Ten years ago that goddamned fence wasn't electrified!" -
Today I spoke to "Vernobia" . I find her name damn funny.
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hahaha, i read tis before somewhere......Originally posted by the Bear:okay.. given the go-ahead
A couple married for ten years were revisiting the same places they went to on their honeymoon.
Driving through the secluded countryside, they passed a ranch with a tall deer fence running along the road.
The woman said, "Sweetheart, let's do the same thing we did here ten years ago."
The guy stopped the car. His wife backed against the fence, and he immediately jumped her bones like he was just let out of jail. They made love like never before.
Back in the car, the guy says, "Darlin', you never moved like that ten years ago - or any time since that I can remember!"
The woman says, "Ten years ago that goddamned fence wasn't electrified!" -
u mean someone really called vernobia???Originally posted by choco B:Today I spoke to "Vernobia" . I find her name damn funny.
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"So, how did you break your leg?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg.
"Well, doc, 25 years ago ..."
"Never mind the past. Tell me how you broke your leg this morning."
"Like I was saying...25 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, for 10 nights, right after I've gone to bed, the farmer's beautiful daughter would wander into my room and ask me if there was anything I wanted.
I would say no, everything is fine.
"Are you sure?", she'd ask.
"I'm sure, I'd always say."
"Isn't there anything I can do for you?" she kept wanting to know.
"I reckon not" I had replied ...
"Excuse me," said the doctor, "What does this story have to do with your leg?"
"Well, this morning," the farmhand explained, "when it finally dawned on me what she meant, I fell off the roof!" -
ahahahahaha, stupid moronOriginally posted by the Bear:"So, how did you break your leg?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg.
"Well, doc, 25 years ago ..."
"Never mind the past. Tell me how you broke your leg this morning."
"Like I was saying...25 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, for 10 nights, right after I've gone to bed, the farmer's beautiful daughter would wander into my room and ask me if there was anything I wanted.
I would say no, everything is fine.
"Are you sure?", she'd ask.
"I'm sure, I'd always say."
"Isn't there anything I can do for you?" she kept wanting to know.
"I reckon not" I had replied ...
"Excuse me," said the doctor, "What does this story have to do with your leg?"
"Well, this morning," the farmhand explained, "when it finally dawned on me what she meant, I fell off the roof!" -
i got a statement about men here.
do u know why men are like video player?
cos they go forward, rewind, forward rewind, then eject.....
sorrie guys -
The seven dwarves were in Rome and went to the nearest nunnery. Dopey got to talk to the Mother Superior.
"Excuse us, but can you tell us where the dwarf nuns are?"
"Sorry", she replies, "but there are no dwarf nuns here".
"Well, are there any in the city?".
"No, there are no dwarf nuns".
"What, none anywhere in Europe?"
"No, little man. None in the entire world. Take my word for it".
At this, the rest of the seven dwarves started chanting "Dopey shagged a penguin.. Dopey shagged a penguin..." -
this one is x-rated too
I think my wife is getting a little nearsighted.
I woke up this morning, she was sucking on the bedpost. -
wakakakakaka, i like tis oneOriginally posted by the Bear:The seven dwarves were in Rome and went to the nearest nunnery. Dopey got to talk to the Mother Superior.
"Excuse us, but can you tell us where the dwarf nuns are?"
"Sorry", she replies, "but there are no dwarf nuns here".
"Well, are there any in the city?".
"No, there are no dwarf nuns".
"What, none anywhere in Europe?"
"No, little man. None in the entire world. Take my word for it".
At this, the rest of the seven dwarves started chanting "Dopey shagged a penguin.. Dopey shagged a penguin..." -
hehehehehheheheheOriginally posted by the Bear:this one is x-rated too
I think my wife is getting a little nearsighted.
I woke up this morning, she was sucking on the bedpost. -
okay.. just remembered this one.. it's SICK
The Lone Ranger and Tonto had been riding down the trail all day. When they had stopped to take a rest Tonto placed his ear to the ground and listened.
"Buffalo come," remarked Tonto.
"How can you tell, Tonto?" asked the Lone Ranger.
"Face sticky." -
They Do It On Command
A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his inmates to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the national anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up nuts!" And the inmates complied by standing up. After the anthem he yelled, "Down Nuts!" And they all sat. After a home run he yelled, "Cheer nuts!" And they all broke into applause and cheers.
Thinking things were going well, he decides to go get a beer and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, he asked what happened. The assistant replied, "Well, everything was fine until some guy walked by and yelled, PEANUTS!'" -
hahahahhaahhaa
i wan more -
Once upon a time there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter. However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly decided to fly south. In a short time ice began to form on his wings and he fell to Earth in a barnyard, nearly frozen solid. A cow passed by where he had fallen, and crapped on the little sparrow.The sparrow thought it was the end, but the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings!
Warm and happy, able to breath, he started to sing.
Just then a large cat came by, and hearing the chirping he investigated the sounds. The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird, and promptly ate him.
The Moral of the Story:
Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy
Everyone who gets you out of crap is not necessarily your friend.
And if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, you might just want to keep your mouth shut. -
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female inpersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing. -
read both before
got one more here..women's pick up lines
woman to man : fuck me if i'm wrong, but is your name mini? -
This man got his prescription for Viagra, and goes home to get ready for when his wife gets home. He calls her on the phone, and says, "I'll be home in an hour."
"Perfect," she replies.
The Doctor told him to take his Viagra an hour before the deed. He takes the Viagra and waits.
An hour goes by, the man is ready to go, but no wife!
She calls him on the phone and she says, "Traffic is terrible. I won't be there for about an hour and a half."
The man, frustrated, calls his Doctor for advice. "What should I do?" he asks.
The Doctor replied, "It would be a shame to waste it. Do you have a housekeeper around?"
"Yes" the man replied.
"Well, maybe you can occupy yourself with her instead?" said the Doctor.
The man then replied with dismay, "But I don't need Viagra with the housekeeper..." -
a little adaptation frm your story.Originally posted by keisha:i got a statement about men here.
do u know why men are like video player?
cos they go forward, rewind, forward rewind, then eject.....
sorrie guys
do u knw y women drivers doing parking r like an inexperienced guy having sex?
cos they go forward, reverse, forward, reverse, then accident...
Sori gals...
vengence is sweet....