Dear Diary(edwin edition)
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never ever encounter any things going smoothly for me.............
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keep cool dude... only with experiencing the bad will u appreciate the good.
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luckly now i got 3 jies to be there for me........but my jies its not that di dun wanna to share my prob with u all,its just that i really duno how am i going to tell u all??its alot alot i just had it enough liao its been my burden for long long time liao i did try to say out but no use lor so i dun wanna to bother and trouble u 3 lor.............although everyday u see me like happy happy serious serious type like nth happen but inside my heart its just like a tangled heart with a lots of knots cant be untangle..............
something i just duno how to say it out of my mouth............. i only know how to go and help ppl to try solve their probs but nt my own 1 and i also dun wish to bother ppl at all..................
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When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
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tough??wats tough to mi??im just not happy with the kind of unfair treatment given to mi in my whole life....Originally posted by Parka: When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. -
It's a rough world out there.
We all experience setbacks.
Guess the only thing that we have control over, is to learn how and decide what we wish to adapt to an environment or situation.
And if all else fails, come into ur own personalized diary to scream it all out.
Oh btw, welcome to the joint. Shan't disturb u further.
>exit< -
dear diary,
i have make my decision today...........i was so upset when i finally have to make this decision...
My dear jies,
di really dont wish to make this decision but got no chioce lor..
actually beside my attachment probs i also have some family probs.... dis happen a few yrs back during that time im reali down.....till the extend i dont wanna wish to live anymore...
things was like that during that time my dad encountered some probs in his job and was facing jobless situation and he was worried about the family till he was down with some health probs which till now hes still on medication....then during that time i decided to come out and work and i fight all the way till the position i have now ....at the same time im stil studying but til now i reali cannot take it liao im reali reali very very tired liao....sometimes back i actually have the intention liao but till now i simply cant take it anymore which i decided to take dis path.....
im very very sad that i have to take dis path which i dont really wish to take......
some people thinks that im making a rush and harsh decision but im not ....hopefully these people will understand me one of these days...and hope that my jies will understand me too.........
And theres no 1 i can blame only myself to have this kind of life.....
in future if theres chance i will definitely continue on my studies....
which i really hope so............
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Di, if u've decided, I will surely fully support u... But u hv 2 promise dat u will share ya happy n unhappy things with us.... Don keep everything 2 urself..... We're always there 2 listen n help.....
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Dear diary,
today my decision have been finalised......i really dunnoe whether is that a correct decision??
My dear ah jies,
when di was finalising his decision as he signed on the paper,the struggle he had in his heart was very very painful............he felt so terrible that time.....he was totally in the loss of mind.........
i really dont wish to give up but due to the problems i facing with my family i had left with no choice...... this two days im totally down with sad emotions with tears sometimes and very moody........
i had this probs actually before i entered dis school....at first,i stil manage to cope with it but from time to time im so tired that i always slept in school till now i really dunnoe what i have learnt that makes me face difficulties in my attachment.........thats make me think am i really studying in school or just go school to past time.......
before i make this decision i speak to my parents they didnt object but in their heart i think they dont bear me to do so....but with the situation i facing i really left with no choice...i.........simply just cant take it anymore........if given a choice i definitely want to continue on with my studies...seriously......like what i say earlier on i dont blame anyone i only blame myself for this kind of life i lead.....
jies when di ask u all out wanna talk talk,its not that he dont wanna talk its just that he feel so miserable that he really dunnoe to start from where and where to talk with...........jies dui bu qi.......
im glad that when di is down my jies r there and im glad that some of my friends understand me too.....
im like that when im down with something i usually dont talk much and will just pondering and pondering over the matter.........
hopefully my jies will understand and everyone will understand....... -
Dear diary,
today my decision have been finalised......i really dunnoe whether is that a correct decision??
My dear ah jies,
when di was finalising his decision as he signed on the paper,the struggle he had in his heart was very very painful............he felt so terrible that time.....he was totally in the loss of mind.........
i really dont wish to give up but due to the problems i facing with my family i had left with no choice...... this two days im totally down with sad emotions with tears sometimes and very moody........
i had this probs actually before i entered dis school....at first,i stil manage to cope with it but from time to time im so tired that i always slept in school till now i really dunnoe what i have learnt that makes me face difficulties in my attachment.........thats make me think am i really studying in school or just go school to past time.......
before i make this decision i speak to my parents they didnt object but in their heart i think they dont bear me to do so....but with the situation i facing i really left with no choice...i.........simply just cant take it anymore........if given a choice i definitely want to continue on with my studies...seriously......like what i say earlier on i dont blame anyone i only blame myself for this kind of life i lead.....
jies when di ask u all out wanna talk talk,its not that he dont wanna talk its just that he feel so miserable that he really dunnoe to start from where and where to talk with...........jies dui bu qi.......
im glad that when di is down my jies r there and im glad that some of my friends understand me too.....
im like that when im down with something i usually dont talk much and will just pondering and pondering over the matter.........
hopefully my jies will understand and everyone will understand....... -
Dear diary,
more of my friends found that the decision that i have made and few of them already start calling up me to check what happen.........
im really so sad to leave they all....i know that they really care alot for me as a frenz im really so glad and i really appreciate it very much in my heart........they did try to help me solve my prob by trying to find solution for me but really cant help me lor the prob i facing is my family prob and i dont wish to bother so many ppls.... like what i say im really very thankful for those to care for me,in my life i will not forget them..........thousands of thanks to everyone who been there for me when im down in my life........
talking bout my mood today its stil nt very gd,i do stil very sad bout it........for the past year in this school i really seen what is call true and caring frenz............i will definitely miss them alot alot.......... -
Dear diary,
my ex boss cum friend look up for me yesterday and talk to me regarding my decision that i made and im glad that he supported me!Hes a person that really understand me well....He teaches me alot of things including work and things that are beyond my work....
i really appreciate it and very thankful to him.....without him i wont be where im today......He do understand what im going through...and support me and always give me advices which actually helps me alot alot....but some of mine frenz stil dont understand y i make that decision.............im so tired of going ard and tell ppl what my reasons behind it....
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Dear diary,
what a day today....so bored and sian.........im working day by day,passing my time just like that.....although im more cheer up but things will just flash thru my mind from time to time which lead me to a totally in another world like that...sometime i do wonder why am i born into this world?i really wonders...........
it gave people happiness sadness torture etc..........happiness maybe only 10 percent out of 100 only,the rest compile up to so much pain and unhappiness....
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dear diary,
i seem to just cant forget about her although it have been a yr plus already and recently i found out she have actually change a lot as in compare to last time when i first met her.....
from time to time she just kep appearing in my mind and all those things we done together....i just cant put myself to forget about it...
til now i actually stil haven give up about her yet..really.....but i just cant bring up the courage to ask her again coz i fear the feeling of that particular feeling...........i did ever try to go after others but just cant forget bout her.......sometime i am really just confuse up dunno what i want at all................i feel so fustrated and upset.....especially when the moment i recall the past memories with her...... -
dear diary,
its been quite sometime i write in liao....
recently i encounter something not very pleasant happen to me at my work and till now i dunno whether have this person forgive mi anot??im a type will just take it and let go and not click onto it for a very long time........
but come to relationship i seem to be clicking on for a long long time which i just cant let go....that day slept early coz very tired and she actually called mi up at 2 plus am but im actually not annoyed at all.....normally i will scold the person for calling me up late lor.......haiz~~i oso very de confuse.........duno what to say...