3 ways to dump your bf/gf

e|mo

20 Feb 03, 12:27

There is no way to end a relationship without someone's feelings being hurt. But when you know your relationship's not going anywhere, it's much kinder to end it, rather than let a person you don't love continue to date you with stars in their eyes.

Even if you hate to hurt people, keep in mind that you're doing them a favor in the long run by allowing them to find someone who might actually think their annoying little habits are cute instead of, well, annoying.

So how do you move on gracefully while preserving both your dignity and that of your date's? These three tips will show you the way:

e|mo

20 Feb 03, 12:28

1. Soften the impact

There's no reason for your break-up to be vicious. Have an adult conversation and consider the news from your date's perspective:
Sometimes, little white lies like "Someone important from my past has come back into my life, and I'd like the opportunity to revisit that relationship" spare your soon-to-be ex's ego a bit.

Likewise, "I just don't feel comfortable getting involved in a serious relationship right now" puts the burden of the relationship's failure on you, in the other person's eyes.

The truth hurts, but it can be couched in sensitive terms. "I just don't feel it's working between us," may invite some discussion or even some argument, but it will give you a chance to air your feelings. Be prepared, though, because it will give your ex a chance to share feelings too.

e|mo

20 Feb 03, 12:28

2. Stop the drama

Some people just can't take no for an answer. It's not only uncomfortable, but it can be downright frightening.

Avoid conversation. If your online service has privacy preferences, set yours so you can't receive instant messages from your ex and he or she can't see when you're online, at least until hurt feelings have healed. If you're not too attached to your screen name, change it. If you don't want to do that, avoid chat rooms your ex may frequent.

This applies to the offline world too: Avoid places where your ex tends to hang out. If you have mutual friends, be sensitive about their feelings and try not to get them too involved. If there's a party, find out if your ex is invited. You may want to make other plans."
Some exes crank up the drama-meter by resorting to slander, threats and other desperate attempts to hold on to a relationship when nothing else works. Don't allow anyone to make you responsible for their own life choices.

e|mo

20 Feb 03, 12:29

3. Be a class act

Ending a relationship is never easy, but minding your manners during the break-up helps both you and your ex in the end.

Don't trash your ex. It makes you look bad and bores new dates.
Don't lead your ex on. Even if it seems kind, it's cruel. Let him or her get on with life, just as you're getting on with yours.

Don't assume that all men or women will do the same things your ex did. If you're hostile toward relationships, take a breather until you feel able to approach new relationships with a fresh attitude.

De|usi0n

20 Feb 03, 12:29

izzit too late if u been steady for many yrs and wanna break up....

e|mo

20 Feb 03, 12:30

Originally posted by De|usi0n:
izzit too late if u been steady for many yrs and wanna break up....

huh? why too late? Confused

De|usi0n

20 Feb 03, 12:32

Originally posted by e|mo:
huh? why too late?

ur trick dont works...especially towards women who 1 cry 2 make noise 3 hang ownself one

e|mo

20 Feb 03, 12:41

Originally posted by De|usi0n:
ur trick dont works...especially towards women who 1 cry 2 make noise 3 hang ownself one

No one is right or obligated for one's life. Everyone is responsible for their own fate. They chose this end themselvles, either too tired or too weak. No one is to be blamed for it.

don't give in juz because she threaten to commit suicide. If not in future, be sure dat she will continue to use dat threat in any situation.

Si|verGer

3 Mar 03, 06:55

Originally posted by De|usi0n:
ur trick dont works...especially towards women who 1 cry 2 make noise 3 hang ownself one

not only women dat r guys who r like dat too.. i scare to meet tis type coz they r those v sticky n hard to get off type... somemore they will threaten u with death wic is v scarey...

e|mo

3 Mar 03, 08:40

Originally posted by Si|verGer:
not only women dat r guys who r like dat too.. i scare to meet tis type coz they r those v sticky n hard to get off type... somemore they will threaten u with death wic is v scarey...

they wanna commit suicide is their biz Rolling Eyes